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Billie Eilish reflects on heartbreaking relationship and split for first time: ‘I can’t fix him, I’ve tried’

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billie eilish
Billie Eilish talks heartbreak in her tell-all documentary (Picture: Getty)

Billie Eilish has opened up about her secret relationship with a man named Q – eventually broke down for the first time in her new Apple TV Plus documentary, The World’s A Little Blurry.

The mystery man, named by Rolling Stone as Brandon Quention Adams, appeared in her new film, which tracks Billie’s rise to success. 

Performing under the name 7:AMP, Q and Billie’s relationship was seen starting when she was just 16 and he was 22. 

During the programme, they’re seen holding hands at her 17th birthday party, and Billie was seen swooning over him on her iPhone, calling him ‘so fine’. She later appeared on his album cover.

However, the Bad Guy singer is later seen telling him off for drink driving, and eventually their relationship dissolves, leaving the young star heartbroken.  

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Discussing the break-up, Billie said: ‘I just wasn’t happy, and I didn’t want the same things he wanted, and I don’t think that’s fair for him. 

billie eilish and q
Billie opened up about her first proper romance (Picture: Apple TV)

‘I don’t think you should be in a relationship super excited about certain things that the other person couldn’t care less about. I don’t think that’s fair to you. I didn’t think that was fair to him.’

‘And there was just a lack of effort, I think,’ she continued. ‘I literally was just like, “Dude, you don’t even have enough love to love yourself, you can’t love me, dude. And you don’t. Like you think you do.”’ 

‘I do love him though, which is what made it harder, because I’m not over him,’ Billie admitted. 

billie eilish and q
Billie said she ‘couldn’t fix’ her ex, but that she still loved him (Picture: Apple TV)

‘I didn’t find someone else, I didn’t stop having love for him. I just, like, spent time away from him for a little while, and I was like, “Wow, I’m missing so much because I’m worried about you all the time. And I don’t want what you want, and you don’t want what I want.”

‘I don’t wanna fix him. I can’t fix him, I’ve tried. I can’t do it anymore, I don’t wanna do it.’

The access all areas film, which premieres on Apple TV Plus today, shows every aspect of Billie creating her debut album, including her relationship with her family and friends.

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Tracking up until her Grammy wins for When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go?, Billie also talks about the tolls of fame and effect it had on her mental health.

Billie Eilish: The World’s a Little Blurry is available now on Apple TV Plus.

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